I've posted, kindly call off the attack dogs

Well hello. I would like to first of all reiterate the fact that I never said I would be any good at blogging. Mostly because I'm too lazy to update. However, today is slow at work and I've run out of things to look at on my usual websites. I never did finish the update on the rest of the England/France trip which is unfortunate. I still have plans to but I felt a tangent coming on and decided to push it back. So basically, I was listening to Loveline last night on the way home from my parents and Dr. Drew said something along the lines of "You have to put on the glasses". Basically, he was saying that nobody can view themselves the way others do. In order to really be unbiased about yourself, you have to look at yourself from another perspective.

Now this got me thinking. I think that it is a rare person indeed who has the ability to do this. I know that I can't, and I doubt most of my friends and loved ones can. We are always going to be our own worst critics. We hear our own worst thoughts that we'd never say out loud. We know our own deepest darkest secrets and every inappropriate thing we've ever dreamed up, coveted, or despised. Even when people say no, you're a good person, even if others reward you for the person you've become, you will always know that at least to some degree, it's all a sham, because nobody will ever get the whole story except you. On the other side of the coin, nobody will ever understand the thoughts and internal debates that go into some of our less than stellar decisions.

But I wonder...how often is what we feel about ourselves what the world thinks too. Or rather, how closely do they resemble each other. How often do people think "Yeah I have my flaws but in the end I'm not so bad because I have good intentions", and the rest of the world thinks they're Hitler. Or maybe someone thinks they're a blight on the Eart and yet dozens of people (hundreds felt too high...) look up to them as a role model. There's this show called "Queen Bees" about hugely bitchy girls who have been sent to reform by their friends and family. It's painful to watch these people who really are THAT deluded. It makes me fear for the world that there are people in existence who think they are God's gift to the human race. Ironically, I've always felt that it's the ones with the low self-esteem that have a tendency to be amazing people, and the over inflated egos that need a swift kick to the eye ball. Why do the shitty people get the confidence? Lame. But I digress. Basically I wonder if even stopping to ponder how you're viewed by others is a sign of weakness or consideration. It all seems very grey. You might say that you should do what you feel is right and not let others effect you. But what you do effects others, so wouldn't you want them to stop and ponder too? This all kind of turned into word vomit so I apologize if it doesn't really make a lot of sense. And if it does, well then kudos to you.

I already have another tangent in mind, but I leave work shortly so it'll have to wait. And judging by my current timeline, it won't make it's way into a blog box until sometime in September. :) I hope this has satiated your blogging appetite for the time being.

BTW, you're all whores for seeing Tropic Thunder this evening. I am sad. :(
Please tell me if it's funny.